Quote of the Day

It's 9:30, Dick Clark should begin his countdown within ten minutes if he wants to hit the mark at midnight.-Jim Norton

What Baldman Drinks On New Year's Eve.....

Look-A-Likes: Ed Bradley & G.I. Joe Doll

The Mayor Stands Small

Three days after the snow storm, and I can still see Sarah Palin's house from my stoop.  I wonder what the city is worse at, running a bookmaking operation (OTB) or shoveling snow?  What a cluster fuck.  Who knew Bloomberg's ban on salt extended to salt spreading snow plows?  And it ain't just side streets.  Major streets/avenues look like a Vermont ski town.  On Monday, the midget mayor suspended alternate side of the street parking but did not suspend parking meters.  The snow was higher than the meter, but under the punishment of a fine, you still had to feed the meter.  That's our business-minded midget mayor for ya.  He treats parking meters like the Bloomberg terminals that he made him a midget billionaire: a cash- generating source of revenue.

Here's a plan for snow storms: if you get welfare, you have to report to the nearest sanitation department and grab a shovel.  If you don't show up, you don't get your check that week.

Set Plaxico Free!

The Giants play at Green Bay this week in a virtual playoff game.  The last time they played at Green Bay was the 2007 NFC Championship game, which is remembered for:

1) the coldest game played in NFL history;

2) Tom Coughlin's face turning various shades of red and purple in the below zero frozen tundra; and

3) Plaxico Burress dominating the Pack with 11 catches for 154 yards.

Plax won't be there Sunday because he is sitting in jail for shooting himself.  Adam Carolla weighs in above in his own unique way on why Plax should have never been jailed.  

Bernie

It was 26 years ago today that Bernie Goetz fought back against his would be muggers.  Looking back, it was a turning point in New York City history.  Crime had reached record levels: the muggings, shootings, drugging, raping and robbing & killing had devastated the public. When Bernie turned the tables on the choir boys looking to rob him, it stuck a chord with millions of New Yorkers.  We had had enough.  The quality of life had diminished greatly because of crime, and the inept response the city had in stopping it.

Bernie Goetz fought back.  And in doing so, he showed  that it was possible to take a hard line against violent criminals.  Our tolerance for politicians who coddled criminals wore thin after Bernie.  Eventually, we were able to put Rudy in office, and he cracked down against crime both big and small.

But it all started with a mild mannered man on the subway 26 years ago today.

Thank you Bernie Goetz, a true New York hero.

    

No Balls

Apparently, the UCONN girl's basketball team has won 88 games in a row, and the progressive gods of liberal equality are claiming that if they win their next game, they will break the men's record held by John Wooden's UCLA team.

And in a related story, a 10-year-old boy in California just broke Hank Aaron's home run record.

Stop with this nonsense that the UCONN girl's team is comparable to UCLA or any other men's team.

It is different because they are different.

Biology matters. That's why we have separate bathrooms, and that's why we give up a seat on a train to a pregnant woman.

The mindless liberal argument: both UCLA and UCONN play college basketball so therefore UCONN girls winning 89 games in a row trumps UCLA men winning 88 in a row.

Really?  There is no difference?  If there is no difference, how come UCONN just happened to schedule every game during the winning streak against other girl's teams?  That must have been just a random coincidence, right?

Please.

I will believe that the UCONN girls broke the UCLA record when you show me a girl who can block Kareem-Abdul-Jabbar's sky hook.

UCONN lacks balls-literally.

UCONN= U Clearly Own No Nuts

What is the UCLA message to UCONN?  U Clearly Lack A (SET OF BALLS).

And therein lies all the difference.

She Knows Best....

I heard Michelle Obama is urging everyone to buy Girl Scout Salads for the holidays.....

Animal House Food Fight is a Hate Crime

Most people see this clip from Animal House as hysterically funny; Big Mama Michelle Obama, America's Cafeteria Lady, sees it as a nutritional hate crime.

Big Mama Obama

We can all agree that our public schools are a mess.  But have no fear: Big Mama Michelle Obama is here.  She spearheaded the outrageous childhood nutrition bill that will spend billions of dollars to build SALAD BARS in American public schools.

Hey,  Big Mama Obama, the problem is not what's on the menu in the school cafeteria, the problem is the kids can't read the menu.

But Big Mama Obama knows best.  She knows what we should eat, when and where.  She is a world renown expert on nutrition, and apparently gained that expertise by being married to the divider in chief.

Big Mama says we can't leave it up to parents to tell kids what to eat, instead, we should leave it up to her.

Obviously, the proper role of the federal government when to comes to food is to make sure it is safe.

The government should make sure there is no razor blades in our salt.  After that, its up to us whether to use salt or not.

Think about the insanity: of all the problems with our schools, we are going to spend billions to install salad bars.

Big Mama Obama is the cafeteria lady from hell: she puts the food on your plate whether you want it or not.

She probably sees the Belushi cafeteria scene in "Animal House" as a nutrition hate crime.

 

 

Oh, The Humanity

Here is the radio broadcast of the Desean Jackson punt return, which capped off the worst regular season choke in Giant history.

No Pets Allowed

Michael Vick says it's a shame that one of the terms of his prison release is he can't own a dog for the rest of his life.  He says his kids would love to have a pet.  Hey, I believe Vick has paid his debt to society and all that, but giving this guy a dog is like giving a crackhead a pipe: Why take the chance?    

50 Years Ago Today....

The Park Slope plane crash- at that time, the biggest crash in American history.

Remembering the 1960 Park Slope plane crash 50 years later

Taking The Rap

Sal Alosi, the Jets steroids & conditioning coach, is taking the fall for ordering the wall.  But he is a patsy.  Like Oswald, he did not act alone.  He did not order the code red.  It came from Rex or Westoff.

The stereotype of the NFL steroids & conditioning coach is that they are muscle- headed dopes.  And in this case, the stereotype is true.

Barack OLiar

Obama the liar:

"When they expire in two years, I will fight to end them," Obama said. "Just as I suspect the Republican Party may fight to end the middle-class tax cuts that I've championed and that they've opposed."

There is not one Republican ANYWHERE that is on the record as wanting an increase in income taxes for the middle class. Not one. And everyone knows it.  But no one calls him out on it.

Lower taxes is a core principal of the Republican party, much like racial preferences is for the Democrats.

Imagine if a Republican President said: "I will fight for affirmative action for minorities, which the Democratic Party has actively opposed."

The press would say, what the fu*k are you talking about, the Dems are ALWAYS in favor of affirmative action."

The same thing applies to taxes.  

But the press are slient mice on this one.

Liberal Family Values

Lefty Columbia Professor and Huffington Post contributor David Epstein was recently arrested for incest.  The conduct in question involved his daughter.  The libs-god bless their degenerate hearts-are defending the lowlife, saying the relationship is consensual, so what is the big deal?

Maybe Epstein misunderstood the memo from the Stoop: We tell the people at the Huffington Post to go fu*k themselves, not their daughters.

The Giants Are Not The Only New York Football Team That Had The Roof Cave In On Them

Dan Fouts, one of the greatest quarterbacks in NFL history, was the color commentator for the Jets-Dolphins game today.  Having Fouts describe the qb play of Mark Sanchez & Chad Henne is like having Picasso judge a finger painting contest between two kindergarten kids.

What a debacle.

It got so bad, at one point I thought Sexy Rexy Ryan was going to remove his lap band and choke Sanchez  with it right there on the sideline.

Go Giants.

Condi

Watch Condi Rice-a Teleprompter & notes -free Condi Rice- school the JOKER in drag, Katie Couric on the rationale for the Iraq War.  Watch the competence on display, and compare it to the disgraceful cabal that are in power today.  Watch what a dopey brainless fool Couric is, and how intellectually inferior this cue -card reader is next to Ms. Rice.                
Breitbart.tv » Condoleezza Rice Smacks Down Katie Couric’s Insulting, Ignorant Depiction of Iraq War

A Liberal Army

Now that their radical social re-engineering of the military has failed with the Senate rejecting the repeal of "Don't Ask Don't Tell", look for liberals to find other ways to impose their values on the military.  Such as:

A Toys for Guns Program where all soldiers can hand in their weapons and get a nice toy in exchange;

Solar Powered Tanks;

Green Bombs-they don't explode, they just warn you of the evils of global warning.

Big Shot Book Club

Muhammed Ali showed up at President Bush's book signing. To the left, it is the first time they want to admit that Ali is brain damaged.  I wonder if Bush asked him to do the audio version of the book?  
 

Muhammad Ali at President Bush book signing for - Mofo Politics ...  

The Liberal Position Taxes The Mind

Here is the official liberal position on our tax rates:

1) Bush lowered the rates 10 years ago. That was horrible

2) The Clinton tax rates were higher across the board. That was awesome.

3) They want to go back to the Clinton tax rates-Those were the days!- but....

4) Only for people making over $250,000.  For everyone else the Bush tax rates....

5) Are awesome.

It turns out liberals LOVE the Bush tax rates when it comes to themselves. No one you or I know making less than a $250,000 has said, "I want to pay more federal income taxes.  I want the Clinton tax rates."  

You will sooner see the Jets sack a quarterback than see that happen.

Which begs the question:  If liberals think that the welfare state is underfunded and that higher taxes are the way to go, why are they excluding everyone from under $250k  from paying more taxes?

Isn't it so nice of them, to have OTHER PEOPLE fund there welfare state?

It's so important to fund, but not so important that they pay into it.

10% of the country pays 70% of the taxes.

50% of the country pays nothing.

But they love their Bush tax cuts,,,, when it comes to themselves.



      

Enough With This John Lennon

December 7- Pearl Harbor Day

December 8- John Lennon Murdered Day

Yesterday, no media attention on Pearl Harbor Day.  Today, it's teddy bears and candles non stop for John Lennon.

Talk about a nation not honoring its own history.  But we know every John Lennon song by heart, right?  The misplaced emphasis is a disgrace.

Years ago Bill Buckley analyzed the lyrics of Lennon's "Imagine" and concluded it was the Socialist/Communist version of utopia.

Think about it:

Imagine no:

Heaven

Hell

Religions

Countries

Possessions

Please.  That's a commie paradise alright.

For a guy who imagined no possessions, he sure collected a lot of them.

Those songs weren't written by Lennon & McCartney; more like Lennin & McCartney

How To Argue Like A Liberal

You see these liberals are hammering Obama because he compromised on taxes?  Let's be honest: What's driving this is that liberals can't stand the fact that we have a black man in the White House.  Sure they say that their criticism is rooted in his tax policies, but we all know that is a pretext, that they are straight-up racists.

Taxed to Death (And Beyond)

Regarding the death of Elizabeth Edwards, one aspect of the story that will not receive coverage is did the upcoming estate tax play a roll in her decision to stop treatment? 

Right now, the estate tax is zero.  It is scheduled to go up to 55% on January 1, but under the deal Obama just agreed to, it will be 35% for all estates larger than $5 million.

You can't tell me people who are terminally ill and their families are not forced to at least think about the harsh tax consequences that will occur if a person dies on December 31, 2010 as opposed to January 1, 2011.

The fact that Obama & the Congress have let this play out for too long, and that forces people like Elizabeth Edwards (and countless others) to think about the consequences of the government taking none of their cash if they die one day and 55% of their cash if they die just one day later.

No one should have to be put in that situation.

But many Americans are facing that horrible decision-thanks to these grave- robbing liberals.

Done Deal

 The Patriots look unbeatable.  I can see it now, Tom Brady is MVP of the Super Bowl, and Jim Nance interviews him on the field:

Nance:  Tom Brady, you just won the Super Bowl MVP, what are you going to do next?

Brady:  I'M HEADING TO THE HAIR RESTORATION CLINIC IN MANHATTAN!

Hypocrisy University

Two of the biggest myths in sports are:

1) Jeter the tax cheater calls his ex-manager "Mr. Torre", and

2) Duke and Coach K run a pure program.

Leave the tax cheater aside for now, but for everyone who wants to know the truth about Duke, and how they funnel jobs and money to the families of their players, the article below is a must read.

For everyone condemning Cam Newton and his dad for trying to get paid, why don't you focus your outrage on Duke?

http://bit.ly/g3E2ml

Nielsen

The great thing about Leslie Nielsen is that he never winked at the camera.  He never gave a look to the audience that said, " I'm a funny bastard."  He delivered the lines, and never broke character.  Do we have funny people in America anymore?  Rodney, Pryor, Carlin, Nielsen joins them on the Mount Rushmore of Comedy.  Some greatest hits:

Mimi Du Jour: Is this some kind of bust?

Lt. Frank Drebin (Nielsen): Yes, ma'am, it's very impressive, but we need to ask you a few questions.

Dr. Rumack (Nielsen): You'd better tell the captain we've got to land as soon as we can. This woman has to be gotten to a hospital.

Elaine: A hospital? What is it?
Dr. Rumack: It's a big building with patients, but that's not important right now.

Doorman: Your coat, sir?

Lt. Frank Drebin (Nielsen): Yes, it is. And I have a receipt to prove it.

Lt. Frank Drebin (Nielsen): Wilma, I promise you; whatever scum did this, not one man on this force will rest one minute until he's behind bars. Now, let's grab a bite to eat.


Vincent Ludwig: Nice to meet you too. [offers Drebin a cigar] Cuban?

Lt. Frank Drebin (Nielsen): Err, no, Dutch-Irish, my father was from Wales.

High Times With Chris Christie

I just watched Chris Christie talk about signing a medical marijuana bill.  The man is such an awesome speaker, he could have started smoking a SPLIFF in mid speech and conservatives in the audience would have said, "Christie is right about medical marijuana".

This Man's Army

With the Pentagon getting ready to get rid of "Don't Ask Don't Tell", look for this new military policy/slogan that will be rolled out ASAP:

We Never Leave Our Buddy's Behind

Look-A-Likes: Biz Markie & Iran Barkley

So Far Gone

We all know that The New York Times is way far gone on the whacked out lefty fringe,  but today it officially became parody proof.

Years ago, the late Joe Sobran wrote that the Times was so crazed with liberal ideology, that one day you would see the following headline:

"New York Destroyed by Earthquake; Women and Minorities Hit Hardest"

Lo and behold, look at a headline from today's NY Slimes:

New York City Job Cuts Hurt Minorities, Union Says - NYTimes.com

They have officially jumped the socialist shark.