Yankee Stadium: Shut It Down Already

(This was originally written in September 2008 when the Yankees were knocked out of the Pennant Race.)

Dear Mr. Bloomberg:

What do the Yankees, Mary Jo Kopechne & Natalie Wood all have in common?

They are all dead in the water.

As such, don't you think as mayor you should speed up the demolition of Yankee Stadium? So many public projects take decades to accomplish, with endless delays.

But in this case, Mr. Mayor, you have a chance to finish this important project ahead of schedule. It will be part of your legacy. Millions of people will be grateful.

Mr. Mayor, I also have some suggestions on how the demolition should be done as well as suggestions on use of the land.

First, can you use wrecking balls that are Mr. Met Heads? What I sight that would be! Like the Berlin Wall coming down all over again.

Finally, when the Stadium is demolished, can we use the underlying land to build a jail? It would be a special jail, for steroid abusers and tax cheaters. I am sure Mr. Steinbrener will not mind; after all he is a convicted felon.

By building the jail, I am taking into consideration the feelings of Yankee fans. Roger & Andy and A- Rod and Jeter the tax Cheater will all find residence in the jail.

It will be like they never left The Stadium.

Thanks.

A Concerned Citizen