Co-Ed Softball & The Pussification of America

(Written last year but still true today.)

Recently, a lot of us got together at a Steak House to celebrate a friend's birthday. While two of my friends excitedly told me how happy they were, because they added an ex-major leaguer's niece to their softball team. One of these guys, the last time he was so happy was when Mike Piazza was traded to the Mets!

Now these two men (I want to keep their identities confidential so let's call them "Chris & Chris") grew up in the same America as me, where boys played sports against other boys and girls competed against girls.

I remember as kids, these guys couldn't wait to take batting practice. They would argue who would hit first. Not now. "After you, my dear" and "Ladies First!" are the buzz words of the day.

I tell you, it is a long way from Pete Rose knocking out Ray Fosse in an All Star Game to my friends batting behind Thelma & Louise in the batting order.

Let's be clear, no one is saying that women cannot or should not play, and no one is saying that women cannot excel at softball. But the rule of thumb is as long as we still have "Men" and "Women" public bathrooms, there is nothing wrong with separate softball teams.

Regarding the co-ed softball team my friend's play on:

I heard after a recent big win, the team celebrated by everybody getting their nails done.

I heard that the team pumps itself up before games by watching Sex In The City reruns.

Used to be that after the game, you went to a saloon, not a salon.

WHERE HAVE YOU GONE TED WILLIAMS, OUR NATION TURNS ITS LONELY EYES TO YOU!